Saturday, March 28, 2009

007 best to worst

Yes, it's come to this. I'm bored today, and there's little exciting happening on the personal or movie making front. OH WAIT- the baby took her first steps last week and is now up to 21 at a time. Otherwise, here's the list....

If you're a fan of the James Bond series, as I am, you have likely experienced both deep exultation and crushing disappointment while watching the saga over the years...often during the same movie. Here's my personal ranking of the 007 series. I know many of you will disagree, but hey, us Bond geeks gotta have something to talk about between movies!

1. On Her Majesty's Secret Service- Proving without a doubt that a Bond film is only as good as its script, this is not just a great James Bond movie, it's one of the all time great movies period. The action scenes are some of the most daring committed to film, the plot is continually twisting and turning and at the heart of it all is a doomed love story. George Lazenby, who only played 007 once, has gotten a lot of guff for this movie, but he's very good. It's unfortunate he didn't carry on with the role.

2. Goldeneye- For my money, Pierce Brosnan was the best 007, really capturing a mix of the snobbishness Roger Moore brought to the role, and the tough guy panache Connery had. This, his first of his four, really nailed the Bond formula and has a great villain and the absolute best villainess ever.

3. Goldfinger- Obviously. The series really started to gel with this one, creating the template for all to come. Though every Bond cliché was pretty much invented here, it's amazing how fresh and exciting Goldfinger remains to this day.

4. For Your Eyes Only- Roger Moore, taking things somewhat seriously for a change, gives us all the bells, whistles and smirks with a bit of toughness previously missing from his approach to the role. We actually believe Bond is in jeopardy in certain scenes as he chases after what can only be called "a mcguffin".

5. The Spy Who Loved Me- Pure spectacle is what this 007 adventure offers on skis, on water and on land. This is the one where the Moore formula of wisecracks and breath taking stunts worked best.

6. From Russia with Love- Of all the Bonds, this is the one that succeeds best as a pure spy thriller, before the gadgets arrived and Bond had to rely less on his wits and more on pushing buttons.

7. Licence to Kill- This one took awhile, but it has really grown on me. All the Bond elements are there, shoehorned into a plot that has a pissed off 007 out for revenge. I used to think Timothy Dalton was too humorless in the role. Then along came Daniel Craig... The finale, a wild chase scene involving tanker trucks, is one of the most Bravo action scenes in the Bond series.

8. Tomorrow Never Dies- The denouement is a bit of a let down, but otherwise this is the best of the full on "action" Bonds. Just sit back and watch the sparks fly, especially during the terrific remote control driving sequence.

9. Dr.No- Welcome to the screen Mr.Bond. Connery in the first 007 screen adventure. There was no template yet, so Dr. No goes into some dark areas the rest of the series played down.

10. Live and Let Die- Moore's Bond hits the screen for the first time, and the result is a compelling adventure, with a more serious touch than usual including a voodoo motif that adds genuine tension. The mid-movie boat chase sequence is a stunner.

11. Thunderball- Connery chases a villain to the Bahamas. Coming right after Goldfinger, it suffers a bit from the "bigger and bigger" syndrome, but it's still full of the kind of fun and adventure Bond does so well, including the only entertaining underwater fight scenes I've ever seen.

12. Moonraker- Yes, Moonraker. Deal with it. If you don't think about it too hard, and just go along for the ride, you'll have a lot of fun with this, one of the most action packed of the 007 movies. It's also one of the silliest, but is still a kick to watch.

13. You Only Live Twice- I call this one the midway Bond: It's not terribly memorable, with the exception of the exciting "Little Nellie" flight sequence and a great rooftop chase, but it's not exactly "bad" either. It's the Bond that separates the truly entertaining entries in the series from the somewhat disappointing so, here we go...

14. Die Another Day- The most disappointing thing about this one? It's exactly "half" a good movie. The opening with Bond escaping from being captured and tortured, right up to about the brutal fencing match between Bond and baddie, is excellent. Then, it goes off the rails with some bizarre gadgets, atrocious dialogue, the always awful Halle Berry, and poorly conceived CGI . That it remains entertaining none the less is a testament to its fast pace, if anything.

15. A View to a Kill- Yes, Roger Moore was getting "way too old for this shit", but this is still an OK dip in the Bond well held together by Moore in his last Bond movie, and Christoper Walken, clearly having a fabulous time as the villain. Minus points for Tanya Roberts, one of the most annoying Bond girls, and an interminable sequence at a horse farm.

16. The Living Daylights- Dalton makes for a slightly awkward Bond here, playing the role somewhere between Moore's jokiness and Craig's deadly seriousness. A terrific opening sequence and some other exciting action scenes keep it from being a loss, but it's still kind of flat.

17. Octopussy- This is the one where Moore really looks his age, and the plot is much too convoluted, but there's some genuine tension during the obligatory "Bomb defusal" scene at least.

18. Casino Royale- I'll state it flatly: I'm not a fan of Daniel Craig's 007. He's too "Hulk Smash" and too little "Gentleman Spy" for me, so I wasn't a big fan of this "reboot", which takes the series in a much more down to Earth direction. Not complaining about that, I just didn't feel like I was watching a James Bond movie while watching this.

19. The World Is Not Enough- The opening sequence is what Bond movies are all about- an over the top chase spectacle, this one down the Thames. The film is worth seeing simply for that. There's also a sweet goodbye to Q and some good lines from Robbie Coltrane, but on the whole, the movie seems to want to have its cake and eat it too by combining a "serious" plot with over the top action. It doesn't really gel. Also, Denise Richards as a nuclear scientist in hot pants named Christmas Jones? Uh huh.

20. Never Say Never Again- Connery returned after a long absence to the role. He looks like he's having a good time, and the result has some good stuff in it, but it's way too overlong, and now a days feels like an 80's museum piece. Remember how I said that "Thunderball" had the only entertaining underwater fight scenes I've ever seen? This too has underwater fight scenes.

21. Quantum of Solace- Craig's second go feels a bit more like a Bond movie, but it's still a pretty uncharismatic affair with edited within an inch of their life action sequences and a plot echoing "Licence to Kill", but coming up short in the comparison. There's little memorable about this one.

22. The Man With The Golden Gun- Christopher Lee is a great, sinister villain, it's just too bad he's in the cheapest looking, most lacking in action Bond of them all. Moore, in his second film, is still growing into the part here, and he's not helped by Brit Ekland, the series dumbest, most annoying leading lady.

23. Diamonds Are Forever- There's a good line here and there, and the two gay villains are quite cool, but Connery looks overweight, old and bored. There are no memorable action sequences and the whole thing is lackadaisical and dull. The broad humor Moore was blamed for bringing to the role is in full effect here.

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